Three phrases to immunize you from manipulation Part II of II
Walls manipulators cannot climb.
Video highlights
Abbreviated transcript not verbatim. Video/YT transcript below.
Ancient Gnosis
Oct 23, 2025
By knowing the game and refusing to play, you self-empower instead of wasting energy explaining why you said ‘no’ to people who won’t respect your yes.
Phrase two: “I’ve made my decision”
Not I think I’ve decided. Not I’m leaning toward no, just “I’ve made my decision”. This is the wall. This statement communicates finality, closes negotiation and removes you from the conversation entirely. Because manipulators thrive on the belief you’re still deciding, you’re still weighing options, if they just find the right angle, the right pressure point, the right emotional lever they can still change your mind. “I’ve made my decision” kills that belief instantly. It’s past tense, done. There’s nothing left to discuss b/c the decision has been made.
Persuasion game
A family member is guilt- tripping you. “We really need you to come to this event. Everyone will be so disappointed if you’re not there. It would mean so much to your grandmother. Are you really going to miss this?”
Most people keep explaining their position as if it’s still under consideration. “I know, but I have this thing and it’s really important and I just don’t think I can make it work with my schedule right now”. Every word signals uncertainty. Every explanation suggests with the right argument, you might change your mind. So, they keep pushing. More guilt, more pressure, more reasons why you should reconsider. Now, you’re stuck in an endless loop of defending a decision you’ve already made but keep presenting as negotiable. You say calmly, “I’ve made my decision. I won’t be attending.” Not, I don’t think I can make it. Not, I’m probably not going to come. Decided. Final. Watch what happens. They try to reopen the negotiation. “But what if we change the time?” Or, “Can’t you just reconsider?” Or, “You’re really not even going to think about it.” And you repeat, “I’ve made my decision”. Same phrase, same finality. There’s nothing left to negotiate b/c the decision has already been made. This works b/c it removes you from the persuasion game entirely. As long as they believe you’re still deciding, they have hope. Hope the right guilt trip will work. Hope enough pressure will crack you. But when you state it’s already decided, you eliminate hope. There’s no opening, no angle, no way in.
Deeper: Protects you from your own wavering
When you frame your boundary as still under consideration, you leave the door open for yourself to cave. When you state, “I’ve made my decision”, you commit. You close the door on yourself, too. That commitment strengthens your resolve; real power. You’re not seeking approval of your decision. You’re informing them the decision exists. It’s done. Their opinion is irrelevant b/c the decision has been made. Remember this. He who presents his decision as negotiable invites negotiation. He who presents his decision as final ends the conversation. Use it and watch manipulators realize they have nothing left to work with.
Phrase three: “I’m not discussing this”
Not I don’t want to talk about it. Not can we change the subject, just “I’m not discussing this”. This is the exit. The phrase that ends not just the manipulation, but the entire conversation b/c some manipulators won’t accept “That doesn’t work for me”. They’ll push past “I’ve made my decision”. They’ll keep circling, probing, trying different angles, refusing to accept the conversation is over. This is when you need the phrase that doesn’t just refuse their request, it refuses the discussion itself.
Permanent closure
You said no. They keep coming back. Different approaches, new reasoning, more urgency. “I’m not discussing this”. The topic itself is now off limits. You’re not debating whether you’ll give them money. You’re not explaining why you won’t. You’re ending the entire conversation about it. They continue “I just need you to understand”. Same phrase, same boundary. “I’m not discussing this”. You’ve removed the topic from available conversation. It simply won’t be discussed. This works b/c it’s not about the specific request anymore. It’s about the conversation itself. When you refuse a request, they can try new angles on the same request. When you refuse to discuss it, there are no angles left. The entire topic is closed permanently.
How these three statements work together
Use them as armor that builds.
First layer “That doesn’t work for me”, boundary without justification. If they push, second layer, “I’ve made my decision”, finality that ends negotiation. If they still push final layer, “I’m not discussing this”.
Most manipulators stop at layer one. They need something to work with and you’ve given them nothing. Some push to layer two hoping finality is negotiable. It’s not. The rare few who push past to layer three realize there’s literally nothing left to say.
Your armor
The manipulator needs your engagement, your explanations, your justifications. These three statements give them nothing. That’s your armor. That’s how you become unmovable to manipulation.
The shift
Before today, you likely explained yourself. Every boundary came with a list of reasons. Every ‘no’ wrapped in apologies and explanations. You thought that’s what reasonable people do … negotiate boundaries that shouldn’t be negotiable. You treated your decisions as if they needed approval from people trying to manipulate you. Every explanation was an opening. Every justification was a vulnerability they could exploit. Every reason you gave became a problem they could solve, if only to get what they wanted from you.
Now you’re different.
You don’t explain. You state.
You don’t justify. You enforce.
You don’t negotiate. You decide.
Growth centric
At first, you may feel uncomfortable using these phrases b/c you’ve been trained to explain, to justify, to soften your ‘no’ with reasons that make others comfortable. However discomfort is growth. It’s the feeling of reclaiming personal power you’ve been giving away. That’s what it feels like to stop negotiating boundaries that aren’t negotiable. Use the phrases anyway. Push through the discomfort, through the guilt, through the social pressure and fear of seeming unreasonable b/c every time you use them, they get easier. Every time you refuse to explain, you reinforce your decisions don’t require external approval. Every time you stand firm without justification, you teach yourself and others your boundaries aren’t up for debate.
Become the example and the invitation
From this moment when someone tries to manipulate you, don’t argue with them. Don’t defend yourself. Don’t explain why they’re wrong. Just use the phrases. Watch them hit the wall and walk away knowing you’re immune to manipulation.
The question isn’t whether they’ll try to manipulate you again. They likely will. The question is, will you give them something to work with or will you give them three phrases and nothing more?
Part I
https://www.ourgreaterdestiny.ca/p/three-phrases-that-instantly-end
Source with thanks https://sageofquay.substack.com/p/the-3-phrases-that-end-any-manipulation
Without prejudice and without recourse
Doreen Agostino
Our Greater Destiny Blog
psychology